Naming Leadership

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My oldest daughter turns 12 tomorrow. When she was younger, she had imaginary friends. Each friend had a name, none of which I can remember. But the name made them personal.

Hang with me for a minute. If you have children, or have ever been one, then you know the power that comes from giving something a name.

We name our stuffed animals. We name our cars (at my former church, “Bertha” was our temperamental van). We name our guitars. Well, you may not have guitars, but I name my guitars and those of other people (shout out to Tay Tay).

There’s an affection that comes from naming them. There’s a sense of pride and ownership. There’s a sense of power.

But at the end of the day, the stuffed animal is a stuffed animal. The guitar is a guitar. The car is a car. The name does nothing to change the fundamental existence. It makes us feel better or more connected, but it does not change the core.

Leadership is the same way. We can give someone the name of leader, but does that truly change who they are at the core?

I see it time and again in student ministry and in watching people who work with students. They wait for students to show a sign of achievement before bestowing the name of leader. Students lift the renaming up as part of their goal–some target to aim for or strive towards. Once they “become a leader”, then they will step up and lead.

What if this approach misses the point completely? What if I am a leader regardless of whether or not I have the title?

What if I am not searching for someone to give a new name, but instead for someone who already doing what leaders do?

I have said this before, and I will repeat it until I stop breathing or am shown that I’m wrong: leadership doesn’t show up because of a title. You can influence people around you regardless of your place on the org chart. You don’t need a title or a position to exert influence. You need a mindset.

I regularly talk with students about “making the room better.” I want them to walk into a room and it to be a better place because they are there, regardless of their title.

This is what I strive for. I don’t have to be up front to accomplish this. I don’t have to touch every life in the room to accomplish this. But I have to be consistent.

Stop waiting for a title to come your way to lead. Grow your influence.

Stop waiting to bestow a title on a student who is worthy. Throw the title away and help them grow their influence.

Then, at some point down the road, you and they will look up and realize you, and they, are making the room better.

Check It Out: 3QL

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What if you could implement a process to help students begin to look for opportunities to not only make an impact on the situations around them, but also to influence their peers?

It’s been a while since I’ve written solely about the three questions, so today I thought I would send you over to the foundation. I have been using these questions to help student leaders expand their leadership influence for the past four years, and the results have been remarkable.

So whether you’re relatively new to the site, or have been around for a while, go check out the foundation and start expanding your leadership influence!

Pass the Shovel

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Have you ever been asked to dig a hole and not been given the proper tool to accomplish the task?

A few years ago I took a group of kids on a mission trip. The group I had proved a little more efficient than the host anticipated, so we started working on random projects around the property. One of the projects was digging holes for a future gate.

Now, growing up on the farm, I’ve had my share of digging holes. We used tractors, post hole diggers, and shovels to accomplish the necessary task at hand. But, I had never experienced having to dig a hole like this.

The ground below the top soil was almost solid rock. So, for the first time in my life, I learned to use a digging bar.

A digging bar, to jazz it up, is a metal spear that chips rock away bit by bit. And it’s work.

Each person in our group would take turns, about 10-20 strikes per person, trying to chip away at the rock. Then, after we had made some progress, someone would swoop in and clean out as much debris as possible. Lather, rinse, repeat.

The funny thing is this: the owner of the property didn’t look at me and say “you have great hole digging potential” and walk away. Instead, he walked us out, gave us the tools we needed, demonstrated what it looked like, and let us get to work.

Developing student leaders is very similar. A lot of people will tell a student “you have leadership potential”, but are we walking away or putting a digging bar in their hands?

If we want to develop student leaders, then our job is not complete at recognizing ability. We need to equip them to step up and lead. We need to find the shovel, post hole diggers, and digging bars necessary to help them grow and accomplish the task.

How do we do that? I’m glad you asked. Go here to read about three questions I’ve developed to help put a shovel in the hands of a student. My desire is not to simply acknowledge someone’s potential, but to give them the opportunity to serve.

As we teach students to lead using the three questions, we are providing them with the opportunity to grow and to come to know understand leadership more clearly. The three questions are definitely not the end game, but they sure do open the door for further conversation.

And who knows, as we teach ourselves to pass the shovel, maybe we will grow as leaders along the way, too.

Understand Your Impact

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Leadership so often boils down to the impact we make.

Think about someone in your life who has had a leadership influence on you. How would you describe their leadership?

The number of books they read?

The size of their house?

The way they made you feel?

The way they made others feel?

Each of those things, in their own way, reveal the impact they had. Some, more than others.

I think some of the best leaders are not necessarily people who set out to be great leaders, but those who set out to be faithful.

What if our greatest impact as leaders is not because of any program we adopt or implement? What if our greatest impact as leaders occurs because we choose to be faithful to our calling?

Let me rephrase.

Our greatest impact as leaders does not come because of a program we adopt or implement. Our greatest impact as leaders occurs because we choose to be faithful to our calling.

How are you being faithful today?

Tim Elmore has a habitude called the Starving Baker. The idea is simple: a baker who neglects his own hunger in order to bake more will eventually die of starvation. Seems brutal, right? But does that mean it’s not true?

Invest in someone today–yourself. Take a 30 minute silent walk. Pick up a book you’ve been wanting to read but just haven’t made the time for. Listen to a podcast that nourishes you. Listen to some classical music, or some classic rock.

Ultimately, at the end of the day, if our desire is to impact others for the long haul, we have to remain emotionally and spiritually healthy.

Take a moment to eat some of your bread, baker.

The Leadership Current

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I was scrolling through Facebook this weekend and saw a post that made me raise my eyebrows. It was a picture of a group of seniors and the statement was something along the lines of “these seniors are ready to be the leaders of their school.”

I think the sentiment behind the posting of the photo was right, but I would push back a little.

Leadership doesn’t show up when the title shows up. Leadership runs like a current beneath the surface, and a title helps bring the current to the surface.

Those students aren’t leaders because they are seniors in high school. They are seniors in high school. Granted, being a senior puts you in positions to lead. Being a senior gives you a level of gravitas to step up and lead. Being a senior allows you the potential to have more influence. But being alive longer (than younger students) doesn’t automatically mean you’re a leader. It just means you’ve been alive longer.

Maybe what I push back on the most is the idea that you have to be a senior to lead. I didn’t believe that when I was in school. In fact, I was not taught that. I was taught the opposite.

At my home church, starting my freshman year, we had a vacancy of leadership, so I found ways to step up. I didn’t wait to have the title. I was given the opportunity and did the best I could.

I’ve seen this play out in the lives of other students. The strongest leaders are the ones who, in the absence of leadership, step up. Perpetuating the thought that “now you’re a senior, you’re a leader” communicates to juniors that they have not yet arrived. Or that a freshman doesn’t stand a chance.

Here’s what I would say: senior year provides a sense of urgency to lead, and that’s completely natural. But, if we aren’t teaching students to step up and lead as middle school students, as freshmen or sophomores or juniors, then when the title of senior arrives, they will be in a sink or swim situation.

If you work with students, find ways to provide opportunities for them to expand their leadership influence. Let’s help students learn to take a stand regardless of their age. Then, when they become seniors, they will have been trained to make the most of their title.

But if you are alive, let me challenge you: If you’re waiting for your “senior year” (literally or figuratively), stop waiting and find a way to step up and lead today.

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